All I wanna see on my T.V. / Is cartoon network and some nudity / no H.S.N. in my face, / and no goddamn Melrose Place. // Chorus: Call me a slob, / Well, I may be / But who needs you / Cause I got my TV // My life revolves around late-night shows / Conan's, Dave's, and Jay Leno's / signing off for this broadcast day / I hate when we part that way // Chorus // I'll look at books occasionally / but I'd rather just wait for the movie / never go out, I've got family / sitting here with uncle TV // Chorus // never turn it off cause it turns me on / I leave on my TV til the crack of dawn / TV Guide is my book and my bible / a lifetime subscription is my key to survival / leave me alone, I'm watching Sanford & Son / its only the third time I've seen this one. / I can't even fake it, it's a drug and I take it / if you wanna kill me, just turn off my TV